March 2010

Impatiently, I flipped through the channels until something caught my eye about a title on the movie channel Showtime: The Edge of Never. I was immediately drawn to the spectacular extreme mountain skiing photography of what I later learned was a mountain in the French Alps in Chamonix France. It took awhile for the theme of the documentary to be revealed as I had begun to watch the film after it had started. 

The documentary based on a book titled The Edge of Never by William A. Kerig, chronicles Trevor Petersen, a world-renowned big-mountain skier who was killed in 1996 in an avalanche while skiing in the Exit Couloir, a treacherous stretch of glacier in the Alps of Chamonix, France. His son Kye was six years old at the time. The Edge of Never documented Kye’s 2005 trip to Chamonix to ski the very run where his father died nine years prior. I struggle to convey how this film moved me and yet I feel compelled to try. Kye Petersen was no stranger to skiing as he grew up in Whistler near Vancouver B.C., so at 15 when he traveled to Chamonix, he knew how to maneuver the “steeps”. Although he had never seen or skied anything like what he was about to experience. 

Some of Trevor’s former ski buddies took care to prepare and train Kye for the trip of his life. When the appointed day arrived, the Chamonix-bound crew, delivered by helicopter, arrived at the top of the enormous mountain. Upon strapping skis to their backpacks, they carefully made their way along a razor thin ridge, ascended to the top of a ten inch wide ancient stone wall until they reached the old metal ladder steps which had supported French adventurists for many years. They descended the steps onto the aged, glacial floor of snow and ice. At this altitude and these conditions, one never plans for skiing this run, one simply awaits conditions that allow for a safer run…the environment was perfect. Member by member they traversed with short and precise hops to position themselves for the pending appointment with Kye’s providence below. Referred to in the skier’s vocabulary as a  “no fall run” one cannot risk losing control or fall; as one would simply and helplessly slide for thousands of icy feet until being catapulted into a crevasse or over a cliff. 

As Kye advanced through his training and preparation, he was treated with a deep sense of honor, a graceful extension bestowed by Trevor’s comrades in adventure.  Each team member, former Trevor confidants and current Kye guardians, ensured Kye was taken care of and safe throughout. They roped him in when they could during portions of the descent. As the group stood together on a 55 degree icy slope and while making their final adjustments for the assault on the Exit Couloir, Kye, almost as if on cue, pulled an urn from his backpack with a label that read: “Trevor would do it”; Trevor’s ashes filled the container. Kye struggled in the cold although he was affected by more than an atmospheric impact, as he loosened the cap, poured a handful of dark grey ash, asked for a moment of silence and then gently blew his father’s remains into the wind as if the elements had conspired with Trevor’s companions to carry the exalted remnants perfectly downwind with grace and ease. In that moment, the overwhelming power of connection was inescapable. I was swept away in an astounding combination of reactions; honoring Trevor and his friends’ commitment to living full-out, the beauty of the mountain and the celebration of Kye’s young life in the shadows of his father’s zest for pure experience. Kye later commented: “I wasn’t getting too emotional in the middle of the Exit Couloir. You don’t really have a chance. But it was spiritually the closest I’ve ever felt to my dad”. Courageously, Kye faced his father’s last experience with poise.

The Exit Couloir would wait no longer and did not yield to the group without one of the ski guides paying the price of having fallen, sliding helplessly into a crevasse and surviving but not before receiving numerous broken bones and internal injuries.  He was rescued and evacuated by helicopter; the rest of the group completed the voyage safely. 

When we hear extraordinary accounts of people embracing life as the Petersen’s did and their friends do, we may dismiss it as an experience few of us can have. We may confuse extreme skiing on huge mountains with what represents for us, the effect of a big mountain and the thrill of creating an experience around it. What is that mountain for you and where are your ski guides who would support your expedition?  This story can touch a place in us reminding us of how sometimes we become accustomed to playing it safe. 

It is an invitation to define what the “edge of never” is for each of us. Take a moment and commit to one step tomorrow toward your edge. 

Repeat until well-done.

February 2010

      Last month many of us conducted our annual ritual in creating an inspiring commitment to improve our lives for the coming year. Memberships to the local gym call us with the lure of that slimmed down body we dream of. We become acutely aware of what would make us happier, wealthier or fit. Sometimes we feel pressured to come up with a resolution to relieve ourselves of the imposing expectations; sentences created and passed on ourselves or accepted from others who wish to fix or change something about us.

         But what if in this process, we got back in touch with that which we have desired in the past and maybe gave up on? This is one of the first things I have people become aware of when I work with them. Why? Because if nothing else, it reminds us of the passion we all too often lose as we grow older or after experiencing defeat. We become so reasonable and practical over time that we forget we have dreams of anything that really inspires us anymore. If we allow ourselves to re-member or re-join with what once brought us that heightened, acute sense of purpose and joy, we can reinvent a new commitment to ourselves and our life. Once tapped into, a reinvigorated mindset can catapult us past the day to day surrender to the ordinary. In consideration of this, ask yourself three questions:

 1)   What would accomplishing this thing do for me and my life?

2)   What am I willing (I mean really) to do to produce this?

3)   What’s the very next step toward accomplishing this?

 Next…actually take one action no matter how scary it is…ONE SIGIFICANT ACTION no matter what! Then look at the experience you have after facing what has stopped you.

Repeat until well-done

We sat together in the family room, with a palpable build-up of what the conversation was to be about. My wife began by explaining the dreaded reality of how Connor, my son, was failing Algebra 2 & Trigonometry.  My first reaction was “Who the hell takes Algebra 2 and Trigonometry at the same time anyway?”

Of course, Connor, who is a junior in high school, wants to be accepted at a good college or university and failing a class makes it difficult at best to have a competitive GPA. 

Karen, my wife, pays close attention to Connor’s school progress on-line and it’s a good thing too because we may not have discovered this dire situation soon enough and Connor was not willing to discuss his breakdown with us. Who could blame him? He knew we had high expectations. Last year, he excelled and now he can’t seem to grasp the concepts. He was embarrassed and overwhelmed.

As the conversation unfolded, Connor opened up sharing how he felt as though the walls were closing in on him. He didn’t understand his teacher and felt she was moving too quickly through the material. He failed a major exam and now feels as though he has no way to recover.

I asked him a few questions: “What would it take mathematically (interesting term to use huh?) to raise your grade to an A? Have you shared your concerns with your teacher? When you think about your class what dominates your thoughts?”

My goal in asking these questions was to help Connor shift how he was thinking about the situation he had created.  

He recognized he hadn’t spoken to his teacher honestly. He had gone in a few times to be tutored before and after class but felt the teacher was too busy with other students. After some prodding, Connor realized he had assumed his teacher knew he was struggling and that she simply didn’t care. 
 
 He was obsessed about failing his class; to him, having an “F” rang through his head over and over with a growing intensity of overwhelm and paralysis. He worried about how he wasn’t improving, that he would be kicked out of baseball and how he wouldn’t get into college. “That’s a lot to take on all by yourself” I told him.

Once Connor began to open up to the simple truth of “what was” and face his role in it, he was free to consider how to cause a different result. Upon this eye-opener, I could see his face change; it lightened up. Now the conversation shifted toward creating an A in the class rather than ”the F”. The energy seemed tangible. We were focused on specific actions to be taken in creating forward momentum.

There’s something powerful about this dynamic. Recall a time in your life when you were faced with a letdown. Notice the way you related to it. If you became stuck in focusing on what was wrong, it offered little room for any kind of solution. To me, it is analogous to flushing a toilet that swirls the toilet bowl but never goes down the drain.

Once one opens up to the reality of what exists anyway as well as to one’s contribution to the situation, it offers freedom to move forward. One must then commit to a solution and be willing to act…quickly; the universe loves speed.

Connor’s whole demeanor changed as we moved the conversation from what was wrong to what can we do next? Now the context was “we” as opposed to him alone. Although he knew he must carry out the performance on his own, he also knew that once asked for, he received support. How did this turn out?

While it is still in progress, Connor has had the essential conversation with his teacher, expressing his recognition of his responsibility as well as the desire and commitment to improve. He has asked for support from people in his life who are math whizzes, his parents and the various teachers he knows. He has re-defined how he is relating to the “problem”. Now Connor is noticeably relaxed and has a sense of grace and ease about his class.

Measurable outcome? Last week, he took another major exam in this class and aced it…no kidding! For him, this example represents two extremes; the very worst performance he has ever had in his school career and the very best he has done all in the same class. For Connor, the toilet finally flushed, the pipes are unclogged. 
 

This brings to bear the relationship we all have toward the concept of malfunction. It calls into question our definition and our relationship to moving pro-actively from failing to producing. In this case, had it not been for the encroaching urgency of failure, the narrow focus and intense commitment may not have been present for Connor. Therefore the extraordinary outcome of acing a test may not have become a vision much less a result.

Some of the most famous quotes drive home the message that failure is not an option such as failing to prepare is preparing to fail. Much of this is centered on the notion that if you prepare well enough you will not fail…

Great…and what if you fail anyway? What are you left with?  Blaming? Rationalizing? Hiding? This is where the test of resiliency happens. Perhaps we become so adverse to the discomfort of failure, we venture out on the limb of risk-taking only to the point where we can plan and predict the outcome comfortably.

I think we all appreciate the commitment to excellence. And, I will submit, relating powerfully to not being successful will define how successful you become when faced with adversity.  What if we re-wired our correlation with breakdown to account for being powerful in the face of its eventuality?

What would it take to see failure as a gift with an invitation to grow and expand further than ever envisioned? How would your performance change if you were open to moving through it with a commitment toward improvement through responsibility and integrity?  

What if you even created breakdowns deliberately for the purpose of producing a brand new level of expansion? Try that approach and you’ll never be the same.

Now it’s your turn. What faces you right here, right now that seems to have you stopped in your tracks? What conversation awaits you that would make the difference for you in this situation? What support do you want that you’re not yet willing to ask for?

 Call or write for a laser coaching session to help move you from the morass of fear to the thrill of living powerfully.

We can all learn from this 17 year old’s courage in facing what seemed an impossible obstacle. It has been inspiring to watch him transform this circumstance from a caustic, paralyzing experience to something that we can all use for our growth.
 
Nice job Connor!

“How touchy-feely is this?” The email arrived delivering words that squealed in my head like an off-key violin stroke. I had just scheduled a leadership seminar for police supervisors. In his response to the advertisement he considered sending his staff asking me “How touchy feely is this?” 

He is a Chief, a friend who knows my work; an enlightened modern leader…open to new concepts…right? I felt the grip of resistance and the urge to push back as I responded to his email. Thankfully my answer smoothed out as I considered the reality of the fear we have to exposing who we really are. 

What produces dread when we are faced with the notion of being touchy-feely? Like all words in our language, we relate to the idea based on our experience in the past. The definition I’ll use then will reflect my familiarity relating to the heavily charged image touchy-feely produces. The police culture admonishes any reference to being human…well sort of. 

On the other hand it’s ok to have a private conversation and admit to the smallest hint of an authentic human emotion in moments of weakness but please don’t do so publicly in a briefing before going out on the street for the evening because it may cause an officer to lose all semblance of reality. It’s ok to give money to a battered single mother who searches for somewhere safe to stay for the night. It’s not touchy feely when cops deliver holiday gifts to kids who wonder whether they will survive another day on the mean streets or when they show up to Children’s Hospital dressed as the Easter Bunny. No, that’s not touchy feely, that’s… um… being an ok cop, that’s right. 

What about the rest of us? Do we experience crippling anxiety when we let somebody see who we really are?…and what of the impact when we deny our contribution to those around us? What do we lose out on when we allow constriction to short circuit what we have to offer? 

Think about the word or phrase that triggers a reaction in you to draw back or water yourself down. Next, get clear about the influence this has on your environment. Notice the results you produce or more important the ones you don’t. Are you there? Now imagine what would create a powerful triumph over your weakened outlook. Try it out and see what outcome you can generate based on your new viewpoint. 

Repeat until well done.

April 2009 

 am always asking friends and clients what they’d like to see me write about. This article comes to you as a suggestion from a coaching client and dear friend and seems so appropriate for what we are experiencing in our country today. 

For some reason I remain intrigued by what can only be described as a stressful and challenging era. We find ourselves forced to reckon with our collective overindulgences and excesses, yet we also have become strangely primed for the kind of life lessons one would have to study for years to master. Except now we get to experience the accelerated version available perhaps only once in our life’s curriculum if we’re lucky enough to be around for it. 

The implications for everyone; whether we have personally lost a job or not, is profound.  Some of us may be directly affected in one way or another: maybe we know people who have lost their life savings and have found it necessary to reinvent themselves.  I watched a piece on “60 Minutes” last night which featured a number of retirement aged hard working people who were counting on having their career’s savings available upon retirement.  Imagine this! Now they are required to compete for what would normally be summer jobs for teenagers…to make ends meet. Some were in turmoil and some had resigned themselves to the inevitability of the change that lay ahead…whatever that may turn out to be. 

So, is it possible to create abundance in austere times as the title suggests? Is it even possible to think in terms of wealth when we may have lost a livelihood requiring a new and unwelcome focus on simply producing basic needs? 

Take a look at the past 20 years or so and you’ll notice a narrowing spotlight in literature, movies & other media focusing on the expansion of the human experience through our levels of awareness. We flock to book stores and movie theaters to learn how as humans walking around on this planet we have the unique ability to re-create how we relate to what occurs to us…on demand if we practice. Our current circumstances offer no choice but to become present with the urgency for causing better, more productive results. 

But what does it take for one to generate this kind of extraordinary approach? I have raised more questions than answers but what we’re talking about is transforming how we think, what we believe and how that can simply and powerfully drive outcomes through transformed behavior. Here are three powerful steps toward forming the life you want.  

Outcome Designed Questions

Let’s take a moment and talk about the art of asking questions. Maybe you noticed, simply reading the questions I posed in this article may have caused a shift, enough of a shift where you may have paused to consider the implications of the question. Your mind then went to work producing an answer…right? Next, notice how the answer produced is directly related to the quality of the question asked. What types of questions do you find yourself asking? Do they lead to outcomes you desire or are they infused with the insidious thoughts of that which you detest or want to avoid? This is an important concept to master in the art of transformation. Often, a powerfully designed question is the most confronting step in creating a new future. 

Start by asking two simple questions I guarantee will move you significantly toward what you yearn for: what do I really want and what am I willing to do to create it? If you authentically ask these two questions and allow the truth to come forward it may possibly shake you to the core. By the way, you already know these answers and you may find that you get weird by weaseling out of doing this because you normally don’t allow this kind of honest interaction with ourselves not to mention anyone else. We’re much more invested in avoiding what the answer would be when such a question is asked, and have been for years. 

Commitment

Yeah I know we all talk about being committed; not just saying “I’m committed” or mouthing the words but being committed to what you really want more of. This represents a foreign mind set for many of us. There’s an uncanny dynamic created when this level of commitment can be generated. William Hutchison Murray said it best when he wrote: 

“Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.  Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation) there is one elementary thought, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans; that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too.  All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.  A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents and meeting and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way.” - William Hutchison Murray. 

The Courage to Act

Here’s the meat of it: this takes initiative and a willingness to get it wrong or look stupid. It also requires a level of trust in the prior two steps and the information gleaned from them. Action, particularly action aligned with steps one and two, produces an affirmative momentum in the desired direction. If you’re like many these days, you’ve moved past the concern for looking good, as providing for the family trumps being too proud to serve burgers for example. Someone said “Motion creates emotion”. It’s true, stay in motion and check for the effectiveness of your results. 

As we recover from the obvious economic adversity, there is an underlying opportunity to experience the kind of growth, expansion and renewal normally reserved for those who are devoted to personal mastery education. Scratch the surface and discover what lies below for you. Embrace the prospect of a once in a life time encounter with yourself. There is no mistaking the distinctiveness of today’s environment which is set up for staggering possibilities in your personal growth and a course correction, setting you on the right track for extraordinary results Step off the cliff and let your future draw you to all that awaits you.

Sam McGhee

This time of year more than any other, raises the air of possibility in us  

about what could be.

Ah  the allure of the future and its promise of deliverance from the morass. We traditionally fantasize about resolutions commensurate with a given new year as if it would be disallowed in say, July or August.
 
The relationship between our willingness to risk a new venture or commitment and the paralysis of fear and constriction is the mystery most intriguing to me. Consider a time when you were moved by a strong desire to accomplish something; an outcome truly inspiring and exhilarating when you envisioned it complete.
 
However, when faced with the requirements involved to deliver on this most desired result, we somehow become infused by a seemingly invisible force that brings along with it, a gripping fear and a halt to the dream. Suddenly we reason away why it would be foolish to have even considered it in the first place. “It probably wouldn’t have worked out anyway” we say or some other accommodating marginalization to allow us to slip quietly away back into the slumber of status-quo. We may assuage ourselves to avoid truly being accountable for playing small by saying “someday maybe…” that way we fool ourselves into believing we may act on our dream later and therefore not have to face anything unpleasant or uncomfortable… like the truth. The thought of wading into the waters of what stirs the very life in us somehow also causes a metaphorical shortness of breath. We confuse the discomfort of growth and expansion as well as the threat it poses to our comfort with some form of life threatening danger.
 
To understand why this happens may have some merit but to cause a fundamental shift in this worldview calls for a willingness to commit to oneself at a level foreign to many of us at times. Imagine being in a situation where you had to drum up an uncommon amount of courage, money or willingness to act in a way that supported your commitment. I use the example of someone close to us being held hostage; that’s a juicy one and one that evokes engagement and emotion…great! Now you’re awake.

We of course would go immediately into action to gain the release of our loved one without hesitation or concern for “how it would work out” and so on. We wouldn’t hesitate and say “When I have the time or the money, I’ll be able to pay the ransom and get my loved one released.” No, I imagine any of us would ask for support, hold fundraisers, what ever it took, we would do; “failure would not be an option” to coin a variation on a famous phrase.
 
Extreme example? Maybe; and the point becomes clearer in the metaphor. If we look past my illustration and reduce it to the fundamental issue that there is simply something important we want to accomplish, why would we act constricted when confronted by a goal that creates a high degree of excitement and inspiration and yet resolute when confronted with the hostage-like example? When reduced to its simplest form; the only difference is the level of commitment to achieving the outcome. In the former, we allow ourselves and our dreams to be watered down by the list of reasons we have amassed over the years which have served to help us evade and survive the horror of anything new and confronting to our easy-going comfortable status. In the latter, we will accept nothing less than success because someone’s welfare relies on that.
 
What if we could generate the same commitment and therefore results when we dream of accomplishing something inspiring or going for something new in our lives? What if we could re-define how we relate to what confronts us to the point we could actually do so on demand? 
 
Those in the world, who can act on this level at will, understand the value of creating a vision for their future which touches, moves or inspires them. They become very present with that vision and what kind of impact it would have on theirs and others’ lives. Next they act in a consistent manner with the vision they created without delay. Once one takes action in support of a dream, an uncanny level of energy develops and seems to generate more energy exponentially. It builds and builds creating an environment of power results; things seem to line up and fall gracefully into place as if there was someone or something refereeing the event to ensure its perfection.
 
When working with coaching clients, we talk about this idea and practice it constantly while moving towards measurable results with every step. It’s amazing what can be measured.  Consider that in fact, you can invent the type of commitment and urgency any time you wish in order to create miraculous results…I’m not kidding. There is a distinct dynamic about living this way. It produces an undeniable sense of freedom which in turn allows for the kind of healthy risk-taking that otherwise may stop us in our tracks.
 
Try these three simple steps to freedom:
 
1) Be daring in allowing what you REALLY want to create in your life to enter your mind (be specific; what does it sound like, look like, feel like? etc. For some of you this may be the biggest challenge).

2) Notice even in the practice of this thought process, the reaction you have. Notice the impact the reaction has on you (be specific without judging, just the facts).

 
3) Take at least one bold, significant action toward what you want for five days in a row ACT, ACT, ACT and then ACT some more. Note the results (no judging or justifying, just the facts).
 
If you truly take this on you’ll notice a shift in how you think about what you want to accomplish and how you relate to the situation. Fear tends to disappear. Worry about how things will work out vaporizes as it is replaced by a focus on producing what brings happiness.
 
This gives you a glimpse of what you can create at any given time with practice.
 
I’ve been asked “What do I need you for as a coach if you’re giving me the steps to take? Can’t I just do it myself?” Great question and it brings up an interesting concept in personal growth. The first thing to consider is that there is a profound difference between knowing something intellectually and integrating it as a way of being. We have all read the books, listened to the tapes and attended the seminars, right? Why then can’t we just instantly transform our lives with the knowledge we have as if simply making the lights brighter with the dimmer switch?
 
To answer this, consider how many books, tapes and seminars you’ve had access to and answer your own question with a question: How many books have you bought and not read? How many New Year’s Resolutions have you sworn would make THE difference in your life and by February you’ve grown distracted, losing track of your goal… and so on?
 
This stuff takes commitment and repetition; it takes having someone who knows and understands the dynamics of how cagy and slippery we are when faced with sticking to it. It takes someone who is willing to smack you between the horns with the authenticity of the “Cosmic 2X4″ (read my article) to hold you accountable. 
 
It is not enough to simply know the tools and principles that provide freedom; no, it takes a bit more effort. The phases of growth are not hidden, deep dark secrets. They are quite intuitive and painfully simple if you think about it. For example, recall how you used to think as a child. During our early days in life, we are expressive without concern for what people think of us or constricted based on fear. It is later in life when we are taught to water ourselves down or hide how we feel. We learn we cannot possibility achieve something because someone influential told us we couldn’t for one reason or another. The natural state of being is, in reality, an innate, naturally flowing way of relating to life. We simply have forgotten or given up on this notion that we are in our natural condition, quite inventive and powerful.
 
Take an honest look at where you are in your life today and since you are reading this article, you are at least drawn to the idea that there is more available for you. We all know the steps (at least on some level) and further that your predictable future one year from today is as it is today save you will be one year older.
 
If you do nothing else with this article, at least ponder, allow for inquiry into what matters to you, ask what if?…then trust and act boldly on the instinct that shows up. 
 
Do not fall prey to the fallacy of “Someday Maybe” as it does not exist.

Author Unknown

It was many decades ago when I first joined the police department, I knew there would be special occasions my family would spend without me. Knowing that fact didn’t make the task any easier. The celebrations I missed that first year depressed me and sometimes made me feel bitter. Working on Christmas Eve was always the worst.

On Christmas Eve years ago, I learned that blessings can come disguised as misfortune, and honor is more than just a word. I was riding one man patrol on the 4-12 shift. The night was cold. Everywhere I looked I saw reminders of the holiday: families packing their cars with presents, beautifully decorated trees in living room windows and roofs adorned with tiny sleighs. It all added to my holiday funk. The evening had been relatively quiet; there were calls for barking dogs and a residential false burglar alarm. There was nothing to make the night pass any quicker. I thought of my own family and sunk further into depression.

Shortly after 2200 hours I got a radio call to the home of an elderly, terminally ill man. I parked my patrol car in front of a simple Cape Cod style home. First aid kit in hand, I walked up the short path to the front door. As I approached, a woman who seemed to be about 80 years old opened the door. “He’s in here”, she said. She led me to a back bedroom. We passed through a living room that was furnished in a style I had come to associate with older people. The sofa has an afghan blanket draped over its back and a dark, solid Queen Anne chair sat next to an unused fireplace. The mantle was cluttered with an eccentric mix of several photos, some ceramic figurines and an antique clock. A floor lamp provided soft lighting.

We entered a small bedroom where a frail looking man lay in bed with a blanket pulled up to his chin. He wore a blank stare on his ashen, skeletal face. His breathing was shallow and labored. He was barely alive. The trappings of illness were all around his bed. The nightstand was littered with a large number of pill vials. An oxygen bottle stood nearby. Its plastic hose, with face mask attached, rested on the blanket. I asked the old woman why she called the police. She simply shrugged and nodded sadly toward her husband, indicating it was at his request. I looked at him and he stared intently into my eyes. He seemed relaxed now. I didn’t understand the suddenly calm expression on his face.

I looked around the room again. A dresser stood along the wall to the left of the bed. On it was the usual memorabilia: ornate perfume bottles, a white porcelain pin case, and a wooden jewelry case. There were also several photos in simple frames. One caught my eye and I walked closer to the dresser for a closer look. The picture showed a young man dressed in a police uniform. It was unmistakably a photo of the man in bed. I knew then why I was there. I looked at the old man and he motioned with his hand toward the side of the bed. I walked over and stood beside him. He slid a thin arm from under the covers and took my hand. Soon, I felt his hand go limp, I looked at his face. There was no fear there. I saw only peace.

He knew he was dying; he was aware his time was very near. I knew now that he was afraid of what was about to happen and he wanted the protection of a fellow cop on his journey. A caring God had seen to it that his child would be delivered safely to Him. The honor of being his escort fell to me.

When I left at the end of my tour that night, the temperature seemed to have risen considerably, and all the holiday displays I saw on the way home made me smile. I no longer feel sorry for myself for having to work on Christmas Eve. I have chosen an honorable profession. I pray that when it’s my turn to leave this world there will be a cop there to hold my hand and remind me that I have nothing to fear.

I wish all my brothers and sisters who have to work this Christmas Eve all the joy and warmth of the season.

We have all been there… God bless you all.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God”
(Matthew 5:9).
GOD BLESS

Thanks,

Sam

If you find these articles inspiring and wish to have them sent to your email as soon as I write them; go to my web-site and get on the email list.

http://www.leadershipawakened.com

An introspective on where we focus

Sam McGhee

©Copyright November 2008

’m back and ready to write again. I’ve not written for a few months to focus on my obligations related to the preparation for the Democratic National Convention.

Today however, I am struck by the notion of how we Americans have been faced with a common and recently profound concept; an idea that if analyzed could make an important impact on us individually and by extension us as a culture collectively. It provides us with an unusual opportunity to do some re-wiring in how we approach our lives.

Too comfy?

 Customary to my life-coaching and leadership practice is the art of transforming “From Status Quo to Status Flow”, I challenge myself and my clients to question the unquestioned part of ourselves in order to produce the best results possible. What does this mean? When we become comfortable we receive a benefit; not the least of which is simply that…being comfortable. We relax, sit back and doze off. This can be nice (once in awhile) but what happens if we forget how we accomplished the things we cherish most in our lives? What happens if we fail to remember what got us here; the hard work, commitment and willingness to risk?

Let’s look at our collective global consciousness as an example. We have been recently faced with how our devotion to being comfortable has produced the inevitable result of living in the status-quo. Now due to the collapse of all that symbolizes our over indulgence, we are forced to come face to face with how we live. It is not a simple economic matter though; it is a belief system issue. A number of red flags have been waving at us for years warning of the impending fall from grace like friends yelling from the river bank pointing out that we are about to go over the edge of a huge waterfall. We, in our arrogance have been so cozy that we have metaphorically smiled and waved back condescendingly while going about our careless and unconscious ways.

“There’s not enough”

As strange as this sounds, this is good news and by the way, a simple and necessary course correction. Doesn’t that sound great? Ok. Perhaps a bit more explanation is in order.

How does this relate to you? Consider this: sometimes we are inspired and excited by the possibility of what we can create or initiate more of but we are faced with the ever-present litany of reasons why we cannot possibly pull it off. “There’s not enough time…not enough money…it will take too much sacrifice or commitment or…’I’ll do it someday maybe’”. Sound familiar?  This reflects a “poverty consciousness” or a sense of lack. We all have experienced this mindset but have you considered the impact it has when you think this way?

To operate on this level ensures a certain conclusion. It guarantees a result consistent with “There’s not enough”. Any of you who work one on one with me knows how we constantly challenge the effectiveness of this worldview. To believe there is not enough is to declare it a reality and therefore any outcomes produced will be nothing more than a confirmation of that outlook.

Now we as a nation, and yes as a global civilization, are forced to look seriously at how we live day to day. In some ways we parallel the ancient Romans who began their republic with hardened and disciplined citizens, willing to fight for their country on a moments notice. Gradually they declined into the soft pampered citizens that evolved into the Roman Empire. This does not occur in a vacuum. The good news is that we are invited to re-create ourselves, to re-locate the deep and rich brilliance we relied upon to build this sacred country; it is inescapable. We have the benefit of historical perspective to help guide our next moves if we are courageous enough to learn from it.

The willingness to re-invent

Apply this to your life. Relate to how you constantly have the opportunity to assess what kinds of results you are producing.

Remember the feeling of getting real clear about something that you wanted to accomplish? Something that just lit you up but produced a lump in your throat and exhilaration at the same time?  Take a moment; look at how you created those situations and the outcomes. Recall the clarity of what you wanted to design in your life but as importantly, call to mind the sense that nothing could stop you; anything was possible, you had just as much access to this thing you wanted as anyone else. And, you were willing to do what it took to accomplish this…remember how it felt?

The model of an abundance mindset holds that we deliberately focus on themes like “How can I reach my goal and create the most powerful outcome possible?” rather than whether the goal can be attained in the first place. These are two diametrically opposed contexts. They sometimes are reduced to the simplest of metaphors; the glass is half full or half empty. It is very important to note the subtle yet profound contrast of the two points of view. Both require that we commit to one or the other view point. In each, we look for evidence of its existence. Both perspectives will be more noticeable as we acknowledge more and more proof that supports our pre-designated belief. The results produced however are worlds apart. One produces constriction and limitation, the other, freedom and liberation from restraint. This is where we can become the architect of our outcomes.

The courage to ask

Now that your awareness is drawn to the possibility of being the designer of how your life can look, open yourself to the required process. Remember I said earlier these results come from questioning the unquestioned mind…yours. This is confronting as it shakes up that status quo we are so comfortable with. Ask the following questions and allow your mind to simply run on them.

1.       Where in my life do I stop short?

2.       What impact does that produce?

3.       What result would be a triumph over the impact?

4.       What am I willing to do to produce the new way?

5.       Who am I willing to ask to help hold me accountable?

6.       What is my very next step and when?

Many of us never communicate with ourselves like this, much less anyone else. Allow these questions to percolate within you for a period of time. Watch for responses to come forward in any number of ways and be willing to act based on those answers as they arrive. This takes practice and can be uncomfortable at first. Use the momentum created by this process to generate more of what you see for your future and you will reinstall the choice you may have lost touch with. It will bring to life the realization that the contrast between poverty consciousness and an abundance orientation can be decided in every moment throughout your day. Over a period of time, this transformation can be life-altering.

I’ve enjoyed hearing from those of you who are willing to take your lives on and try these tools & principles out; keep the feedback coming and live powerfully! 

Now go forth and transform–Leader!  

Let’s hear from you. Send feedback: sam@leadershipawakened.com on this article and how it affected you or topics you would like to have discussed in future articles.

____________________________________ 

 For me, closure has been bitter-sweet. We have been hyper focused on this occasion for nearly 15 months and as August closed, the more intense the pressure and activity became. When game day arrived, it seemed surreal. DNC week arrived and left with all its activity. Suddenly it was Friday morning at 2am and I realized, “Hey! This thing is over”! I was overwhelmed with a feeling of let down and the sudden realization that we finished the biggest most successful department-wide effort we’ve ever been involved in and our police department had shown brightly throughout.

As I think about our collective experience I am struck by your willingness to take on a commitment that many times looked uncertain and not quite as defined as we all would prefer. You trusted in the idea of what we needed to accomplish even with stumbling blocks and limitations and criticism for committing to such a large and sometimes unpredictable task. This article is a meager attempt to describe my deep appreciation for what you have just achieved.

Considering the enormity of our mission from our first leadership meeting in May 2007 to the last mop-up planning detail in August just before most of you deployed on August 23rd, none of us truly knew how this would turn out. The intelligence told us what was possible from the protesters and anarchists in past conventions. The potential of what you could have faced was not a pleasant thought. But throughout the planning, you trained hard, remained focused and resilient…because that’s what you do. Some were frustrated at times as we were not in direct control of all aspects of the planning or information flow; this was not our event after all.  Nevertheless, we simply focused on what we did have control over, our own training, planning and preparation…most of all our attitudes and our commitment.  

Showing Restraint

Take a moment and truly acknowledge yourself and your teammates. You were featured daily in the world media standing stoically as young anarchists released furious epithets at you from an inch away carefully designed to provoke your overreaction. You showed compassion to other young protestors who were simply expressing their freedom to peacefully convey their concerns. You acted upon and conducted tenacious follow-up on criminal behavior that may have prevented an assassination attempt. You remained here in our city protecting the citizens.  You  provided the daily critical support functions in Records, Impound, Investigations, the Chief’s Office and other units within the Department, functions all too often taken for granted.

My sincere hope is that those few who were critical of our police department have been inspired by what extraordinary results can be produced when there is a shared vision, a dedication, a willingness to take on a risk for a vital cause; and to overcome the fear of uncertainty. All you need do is look around and notice how this agency had the courage to go forward and deliver in the face of all that could have gone wrong.

Obviously this experience has inspired me to write and I will be forever grateful to have been so intimately involved in our participation. It is a reminder that this had precious little to do with any of our political beliefs, or our thoughts about how the government has or has not performed; it has everything to do with our sacred mission on a daily basis to ensure events like this are provided a safe environment from which people can exercise the fundamental rights our country is based upon. It has everything to do with how we deal with new and confronting initiatives. It has everything to do with our ability to overlook our personal agendas and perform at high levels even in the face of tremendous challenges. It has everything to do with creating new relationships with our brothers and sisters in law enforcement and building upon those relationships already established. 

Compassion

Now you can rely on a higher level of cooperation between law enforcement and other first responder agencies in this town due to the success of this event. Whether it is a simple agency to agency request or another regional event, you will find fewer obstacles and smoother processes.

Because of how you performed you can be proud of how you dealt with this particular ordeal as well as setting the example for other agencies to follow in the future. You drew the community’s attention to how skilled we are.  Your professionalism sparked a feeling of pride throughout this state by adding quality to the convention as a whole in front of the world. I know this because I heard it from many people.

It goes without saying that in the past you have faced a lot of challenges presented to you with confidence and excellence…but my friends, you have taken yourselves to a new level. This time you have proven that there is nothing you won’t take on. There is nothing you won’t be open to. There is nothing you are too afraid to accept as a new trial. You have exemplified what it means to be a professional and I am incredibly proud of each and every one of you!

I could go on but you get the point…Thank you!

With pride and gratitude, 

Sam McGhee